Apple?
No, thank you.
Its good.
Errr, okay.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Dreamer
I hope I have a car.
Not that I am lazy, but sometimes it makes a lot of things easier. Like I no need to feel guilthy travelling around, and I can drive whenever I want. Sometimes I have to rush from tuition to tuition and also tuition to dance. After dance is another tiring journey back, thank goodness michael can drive me home. Like tomorrow I have to buy the stupid textbooks, thus have to go back home and deposit them before proceeding on to bugis, and then back to school. All in a matter of 6 hours or less.
I always ask mr tam why is it that I cant seem to match up to others. When I go shopping, I will only buy like non branded stuff and yet I see young secondary school kids carrying mango and zara bags. Then I ask myself why is it that I slog so hard for tuition and yet I am poorer than these kids. I see peers having their own cars when they dun even work hard for it. And mr tam ask me why do I always buy stuff. Simple, I earn the money, I deserve to spend it on myself.
I dunnoe if I can be considered materialistic. I would very much prefer to call myself a dreamer.
Not that I am lazy, but sometimes it makes a lot of things easier. Like I no need to feel guilthy travelling around, and I can drive whenever I want. Sometimes I have to rush from tuition to tuition and also tuition to dance. After dance is another tiring journey back, thank goodness michael can drive me home. Like tomorrow I have to buy the stupid textbooks, thus have to go back home and deposit them before proceeding on to bugis, and then back to school. All in a matter of 6 hours or less.
I always ask mr tam why is it that I cant seem to match up to others. When I go shopping, I will only buy like non branded stuff and yet I see young secondary school kids carrying mango and zara bags. Then I ask myself why is it that I slog so hard for tuition and yet I am poorer than these kids. I see peers having their own cars when they dun even work hard for it. And mr tam ask me why do I always buy stuff. Simple, I earn the money, I deserve to spend it on myself.
I dunnoe if I can be considered materialistic. I would very much prefer to call myself a dreamer.
Sunday, January 13, 2008
Drained
Since the two weeks I came back from US, I have done almost nothing but dance.
Its dance dance dance all day. I have danced for almost 5 out of 7 days. Sunday at TAT, Tuesday at YMCA, Wednesday at NUS, Thursday at ECNAD and Friday at NUS. On Thursday at ECNAD my leg was trembling throughout all the exercises.
It was so bad that saturday I had choose not to go for the most challenging class, but to really just rest and do nothing. I felt so lethargic in the morn, and mr tam seeing me like this, decided to walk out of the room without saying a word. It turned out after that that he was trying to help me clean out the dog's mess so that I wont have to do it later. Thanks mr tam!
I guess when people are tired they have strange desires. When I fell asleep on Friday I dreamt of my mum's porridge. Not the abalone kind, but just plain porridge with side dishes like tofu, eggs and potato and vegetables. Trust me, the desire is so overpowering that you dont feel like eating anything else. Nice mr tam knowing that immediately brainstormed for places, but I suddenly remembered my market has some porridge stores and ALAS! I had my nice and warm porridge in the morning. Not as nice as my mum's but good enough, it is very satisfying.
I tell mr tam that my next desire is my mum's mutton soup. and my dad's crab. Lucky for him, both I already have places in mind. Unlucky thing is my desires are getting more expensive, I miss new year's abalone, which most probably cant be eaten this year le.
Back to dance. I am feeling very flop during dance nowadays, I cant get moves right and everyone seems to do it much better than I do. I am getting the weird feeling that I want to be moved to the back of the formation instead of the front because I am really not confident of myself. I love all the dances I am in, but somehow I feel like I am destroying them all. And my ballet lessons had been greatly unsuccessful. I think that explains why I feel so drained, like everything is being sucked out of me.
So why am I still dancing so often? I guess YY's blog provided a very good answer, "the good things that make dance practises bearable are the pple in chinese dance. they are really a bunch of fun loving pple, and i enjoyed their company. seriously speaking i dun love to dance, but its the pple that make me wanna go back and dance." Although I am not so close to Chinese Dance people right now, I still think its very true. The people in the classes do determine how much you would want to go back to the class, though my love for dance is making it even more encouraging for me to go back everyday to torture myself.
Here I would like to share something which I hope people wont translate for the people I love.
My favourite item, "Shattered" talks about a lost hope, dream or love. When my choreo told me that, I immediately thought of a lost hope because it is so relevant to the theme of this dance. How it is lost, and you try to find it but yet so afraid to reach out for it and in the end, you have to resort to extreme measures. I thought of my hope to become a teacher. How it is lost, and how i reach out for it and yet so afraid to reach out for it at the same time. How afraid I am to face my current choice of becoming an accountant, and how I know in the end nobody can help me. It is exaggerated of course my expression, but when I reach my hands out to reach for it, I would automatically shrink it back, because I know it is impossible and I shouldn regret my own decision.
Well I guess thats why I got drained as well, mentally that is.
The ending of 2007 and beginning of 2008 doesnt seem to be a good start. Though I hear many wedding bells, I have also heard of a lot of my close friends seperating from their loved ones.
One last thing: my relative has kindly invited us for reunion dinner this year knowing my parents are not around. If you know me well, you would know how I feel.
Its dance dance dance all day. I have danced for almost 5 out of 7 days. Sunday at TAT, Tuesday at YMCA, Wednesday at NUS, Thursday at ECNAD and Friday at NUS. On Thursday at ECNAD my leg was trembling throughout all the exercises.
It was so bad that saturday I had choose not to go for the most challenging class, but to really just rest and do nothing. I felt so lethargic in the morn, and mr tam seeing me like this, decided to walk out of the room without saying a word. It turned out after that that he was trying to help me clean out the dog's mess so that I wont have to do it later. Thanks mr tam!
I guess when people are tired they have strange desires. When I fell asleep on Friday I dreamt of my mum's porridge. Not the abalone kind, but just plain porridge with side dishes like tofu, eggs and potato and vegetables. Trust me, the desire is so overpowering that you dont feel like eating anything else. Nice mr tam knowing that immediately brainstormed for places, but I suddenly remembered my market has some porridge stores and ALAS! I had my nice and warm porridge in the morning. Not as nice as my mum's but good enough, it is very satisfying.
I tell mr tam that my next desire is my mum's mutton soup. and my dad's crab. Lucky for him, both I already have places in mind. Unlucky thing is my desires are getting more expensive, I miss new year's abalone, which most probably cant be eaten this year le.
Back to dance. I am feeling very flop during dance nowadays, I cant get moves right and everyone seems to do it much better than I do. I am getting the weird feeling that I want to be moved to the back of the formation instead of the front because I am really not confident of myself. I love all the dances I am in, but somehow I feel like I am destroying them all. And my ballet lessons had been greatly unsuccessful. I think that explains why I feel so drained, like everything is being sucked out of me.
So why am I still dancing so often? I guess YY's blog provided a very good answer, "the good things that make dance practises bearable are the pple in chinese dance. they are really a bunch of fun loving pple, and i enjoyed their company. seriously speaking i dun love to dance, but its the pple that make me wanna go back and dance." Although I am not so close to Chinese Dance people right now, I still think its very true. The people in the classes do determine how much you would want to go back to the class, though my love for dance is making it even more encouraging for me to go back everyday to torture myself.
Here I would like to share something which I hope people wont translate for the people I love.
My favourite item, "Shattered" talks about a lost hope, dream or love. When my choreo told me that, I immediately thought of a lost hope because it is so relevant to the theme of this dance. How it is lost, and you try to find it but yet so afraid to reach out for it and in the end, you have to resort to extreme measures. I thought of my hope to become a teacher. How it is lost, and how i reach out for it and yet so afraid to reach out for it at the same time. How afraid I am to face my current choice of becoming an accountant, and how I know in the end nobody can help me. It is exaggerated of course my expression, but when I reach my hands out to reach for it, I would automatically shrink it back, because I know it is impossible and I shouldn regret my own decision.
Well I guess thats why I got drained as well, mentally that is.
The ending of 2007 and beginning of 2008 doesnt seem to be a good start. Though I hear many wedding bells, I have also heard of a lot of my close friends seperating from their loved ones.
One last thing: my relative has kindly invited us for reunion dinner this year knowing my parents are not around. If you know me well, you would know how I feel.
Hai, I would love to go back to these days:
Thursday, January 3, 2008
US trip continued
Finally I am well enough to blog about this long trip. Blogging while waiting in school for the dance people to return from rock climbing.
What to say about this trip, well it is one of the memorable trips i guess. A lot of good things, but a lot of bad things happened as well. However, all the bad things were eventually solved and I learnt a lot more about people around me. Lets start from the very beginning.
After 25 hours of long flight, Mr Tam and I first arrived at JFK airport where my dear senior Ah Fu kindly picked us up and brought us to his apartment in Manhattan. We travelled in the MRT, and were lugging our luggages all around, thank goodness there were few people. His apartment was warm and cozy, and very accessible to everywhere. Thank goodness he could lend us his place, cause we really saved on accomodation. Mr Tam and I then went to explore and found Whole Foods Market!! Being greedy me, I immediately bought food for breakfast the next day, wahaha. It also became my official favourite grocery shopping place! That night, Ah fu treated us to jap cuisine which was very nice. But on the way to and fro, I almost freezed to death though I was fully geared.
What to say about this trip, well it is one of the memorable trips i guess. A lot of good things, but a lot of bad things happened as well. However, all the bad things were eventually solved and I learnt a lot more about people around me. Lets start from the very beginning.
After 25 hours of long flight, Mr Tam and I first arrived at JFK airport where my dear senior Ah Fu kindly picked us up and brought us to his apartment in Manhattan. We travelled in the MRT, and were lugging our luggages all around, thank goodness there were few people. His apartment was warm and cozy, and very accessible to everywhere. Thank goodness he could lend us his place, cause we really saved on accomodation. Mr Tam and I then went to explore and found Whole Foods Market!! Being greedy me, I immediately bought food for breakfast the next day, wahaha. It also became my official favourite grocery shopping place! That night, Ah fu treated us to jap cuisine which was very nice. But on the way to and fro, I almost freezed to death though I was fully geared.
Scenery from the plane
Ah Fu's cozy home
Washington Square Park
Ah Fu's cozy home Washington Square ParkThe second day Mr Tam and I went to take MRT ourselves to Times Square. Goodness, it is a musical paradise! However, the crowd is too much for me to take. We first went to Madam Tussaud to take pics with the wax statue. Initially I wanted to go inside the Chamber of Horrors but when the staff told me there would be live actors, I freaked out. Rather, I chickened out. Haha, after that we went on to explore the huge Toy R Us, M&M and Hersheys shop before we we make our way to Rockefeller Center to catch a glimpse of the huge Christmas tree and the all so famous outdoor Skating rink.
Trying to show that I am the third party, haha...
I look like pussy in boots!
Mr Tam like Bush.
Mr Tam's twin brother 
In Saturday we explored about downtown manhattan, where mr tam and I got lost. Haha, but we managed to go to the Union Square Flea Market which was quite fascinating. Oh yah, and this is the day which we slept for 16 hours to catch up on our jet lag.
Sunday Ah Fu brought us to the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island. Long long walk but it was quite worth it. Though I must warn people, dun go the open deck on the boat to Statue of Liberty, at least not in winter. It is cold like mad. Initially we wanted to go to the top of Statue, but it turned out that required booking. Oh well, at least I've been there. After that we went to watch a dance performance and then dinner with Ah fu's dance friends.
Monday we went to the Museum of Natural History which Night at the museum was filmed. It is a huge huge museum. We only walked like 3/4 of the museum and my leg is giving way already. Their exhibits were great, especially the way they displayed the different animals. It is really very different from those in Singapore, thus opening our eyes to how creative even boring exhibits can be. After that we went on to explore Central Park, which is very scenic.
Next day we were just loitering about, and at night we went to watch the famous ballet, "The Nutcracker". Both of us nearly fell asleep in the first part, cause it was mostly acting and not much dancing. The second part however was very impressive. A pity the fire siren kept going off during this time, much to the dismay of the audience.
Wednesday was the day much awaited for! We were going to take a train to Rhode Island where I would finally see the kids! However, the train was delayed for like two hours. Nevertheless, I reached the place with much anticipation and when I saw Kelp with my mum and all the kids, the feeling was so great. Isaac was happy, but Leanne and Jayson looked a bit hesitant. Days at Rhode Island was very simple and nice, thus I would go on fast. We went to Walmart, Old sturbridge Village (where they had marvellous maple butter), Wrentham Village outlets. An important point to note is that we thought we saw snow in New York (small white styrofoam balls they looked like) but we were very wrong. It was snowing heavily in Rhode Island for many days and the kids had much fun sliding down a snow slope, sitting in a sledge and building a snow man (well, technically mr tam and I built it). It was fun for the both of us as well, rolling the snowman. It was not easy and it was heavy, thus explaining why our Frosty only has 2 parts instead of 3.
We also went to Florida as a family, to places like Busch garden, Disneyland and going on a sunset cruise. It was nice to escape from the cold though Florida isn exactly warm either.
Ha can see my entry for the last 2 weeks are very short, not because I am lazy but well, there is too much to tell. Every moment with my family was great. It was until I was there when I realised how much I missed my parents. Not just them cooking, but well just talking to them and even sitting on my dad's car. It was so comfortable that it didn feel like travel, it was like home. And of course, Kelp and my sis and the kids. It was so much fun being with them. I look forward to every morn when I wake up and walk down the stairs and I would see Isaac and Jayson eating thier breakfast. (Leanne is still sleeping, cos she sleeps later than the other two. Why she sleeps later? Cause she can talk and talk to herself the whole night.)
And of course, it was comfortable with mr tam as well. This trip took our relationship to another new height. It is the first time we spend 3 weeks together and I grew to be more and more dependant on him. No doubt we still had tiffs during the trip, but he was always there when I needed someone. I guess I could never make it up to him considering this is an expensive trip and we didnt really see many places because of the kids. But I guess he understands that the aim of my trip this time is to spend time with my family. And I am very grateful to him for that.
Well all in all this trip was worth it, I can proudly say I have been to New York and it allowed me to see my family again. Nothing is more valuable than that.
.
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
US trip
Havent blogged about my US trip yet because I am still jet lagging and is suffering from a terrible flu.
Stay tuned for more pics.
For now, just one pic can represent my feelings for almost the whole trip.
Stay tuned for more pics.
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